A concerned reader has reached out with a situation in their small government office. They have noticed that a long-time male coworker consistently fails to address women by their names, instead opting for generic terms like “you” or “her.” This has caused confusion and frustration among the female employees, as it makes it difficult to know who he is referring to.
It’s unclear whether this behavior is intentional or simply a result of forgetfulness, but regardless, it is important to address. The reader wonders if they should just accept it as a quirky behavior or take a more proactive approach to addressing it.
One suggestion is to directly confront the coworker about his behavior. By asking him why he never uses women’s names while using men’s names freely, the reader may gain insight into his motivations. It may also be helpful to point out the confusion and inconvenience caused by his lack of specificity in addressing women.
It’s possible that the coworker is uncomfortable around women or sees them as a homogenous group without individual identities. Regardless of the reason, this behavior is inappropriate and should not be tolerated in the workplace. By consistently calling him out on his actions, the reader may encourage him to change his behavior.
Additionally, the reader could consider bringing this issue to the attention of their supervisor. While it’s likely that the boss has already noticed this behavior, explicitly addressing it may prompt her to take action and address the situation.
